Everyone loves a good wedding.
Me on the other hand?
I love a shit sow, give me disaster, a storm, the bride and groom barely know each other, the bride’s fucked off, the maid of honour just found out she’s pregnant, the best man hooked up with the grooms sister, the parents aren’t talking, it’s a cash bar.
I think it’s just more fun that way. More fun for me to watch that is.
So when I saw that there was another A Christmas prince movie I knew I needed to watch it and use my reaction as content!
Also, I forced my mum to watch this with me.
Title: A Christmas Prince: The Royal Wedding
Director: John Schultz
Writer: Nate Atkins, Karen Schaler
Stars: Rose McIver, Ben Lamb, Alice Krige
Genre: Drama, romance
Synopsis*: A year after helping Richard get to the throne, Amber is about to become his wife. But is she really made to be queen?
Oh boy here we go
I will never like when a character is typing/writing and says like one sentence out loud. Nobody does that, you weirdo.
Unless you are hundreds of pages deep in a draft of a book and then talk to yourself all you want you deserve it.
Why would she not know they’d be sending royal cars??? Like, do y’all never communicate?
WTF is an attaché???
Is that like a fancier Butler??
Who knew there could be something fancier than having your own butler
Is her dad played by a different actor than last time?
I can’t even check because the characters don’t even have last names on IMDB
Not even the lead character
OMG he did a lift hug on the queen regent
Of course, Emily loves him
Oh, of course, the king, her fiancé is busy.
I wonder if they’ve boned yet??? Surely they have.
Oh there he is
Oh her last name is Moore
Oh the dad’s name is Rudy
Then the father is a different actor
I’m equal parts shocked and proud that I noticed that.
Why the fuck isn’t that on the IMDB page????
I really do like the queen regent
I already love the wedding planner
He’s only been on screen for like 5 seconds
Of course, Mrs Averill is her “protector” aka puppet master for the press
I still can’t get over how they got engaged after knowing each other for what days??? Like there is so much you don’t know about each other but you’re gonna be MARRIED
They speak to each other like fucking strangers or coworkers at most
Okay never mind the wedding planner is going far too Avante Garde
Who is the creepy stranger???
Is he gonna try and assassinate the king???
This movie could really use an assassination.
Who’s lord Leopold again?
It’s the stranger!
Mum: Who’s he?
Me, absolutely clueless: Her ex boyfriend!
King Richard: Simon.
Me: His ex boyfriend!
Oh boooo it’s just his gross cousin
How did I notice that Amber’s dad is played by a different actor but couldn’t recognise the gross cousin????
King Richard: I don’t know how you’ll regain our trust
Simon: But we’re cousins
Me: Don’t forgive him, you’re being dumb
King Richard forgives him
Me: Why are you like this??? This is why your kingdom is in absolute shambles you idiot.
I love Mr. Zambalta
I’m digging this attaché thing
All the lights go out during play rehearsal
Amber: This can’t be right
Me: No fucking shit Sherlock
Fucking crypto-currency, trust the bloody cousin to come up with that one
Leopold is skimming from the top Mark my words
Wait, is the cousin not the dodgy one this time????
It. Just. Got. Interesting.
Yes take a photo with your finger covering the camera I’m sure that’ll come out great
Aw the play’s a bit cute
The chef and the dad are gonna fall in love and I’m here for it
Ooohhh our girl is about to lose her shit
God damn it
Amber might be becoming the queen but Emily is the queen of shade
Queen regent: We are doing everything we can
Me: No you’re fucking not, you’re not listening to the future queen you dummies
Did no one teach them how to actually shoot a bow and arrow???
Oh yeah Richard did, he did an awful job then.
Mum: You need to finish filling out your name change paperwork
Me: It’s almost done, I just need to scan my ID and shit
Mum: Well you need to do it soon or else you’re not going to have a Christmas present at all.
Me: I’ve been busy!
Mum: She says as she watches Christmas movies
Me: ITS FOR BLOG CONTENT IT’S NOT JUST FOR FUN
Me: Okay it’s a little bit for fun.
Yes, royal detectives, I am here for it
She didn’t really just write fishy in her notes, Jesus Christ
Ohhh gross cousin is helping!
Yes princess Emily coming in with the goods
Of course, she can hack
I love her
That was the lamest bachelorette party I’ve ever seen on my life
You didn’t have to tell them!!!!!
King Richard is in the doghouse the spineless shit head
Amber has fucked right off and honestly thank god
Richard: there’s only one place she could be
Me: Then why the fuck didn’t you look there first ya dummy
Well it’s about fucking time
Why are kings always so dumb???
Of course, she’s got a fucking bow and arrow
THERE’S REALLY A DUNGEON
Honestly, who gives a fuck about anything else they really have a dungeon
If there’s anything to take away from this movie it’s that the cousin isn’t so bad who would have thought?
Turns out losing all your money and being rejected by your royal family will really bring you down a peg or two??
Me: You fought for your wedding dress and that’s what you fucking chose???
Mum: I like it
Me: But it’s so boring
Oh wait I love the sneakers
This song makes me think of the fuck a dick vine
I want it to be played at my wedding
And those that really know me will know what I’m really singing in my head
Ooohhh the queen regent and the attaché are gonna get married
Why does every fucker have to be paired off with someone???
This is why everyone rolls their eyes at the straights
Y’all need to learn that being without a partner is actually okay
Of course, the only two gays are gonna get together
Because remember gays, all we need to have in common in order to fall in love is our sexuality.
I fucking love bloopers
*Taken from IMDB.
**If you would like me to include links to purchase movies from a specific store in my reviews please let me know!
I hope you enjoyed this disaster wedding as much as I have
Christmas day I will be sharing what I thought while watching The Holiday!
Bet you thought I was gonna do Love Actually!
What is your fave movie with a disaster wedding?