So what started as a month break turned into just over three months.
When I decided to take a break, the plan was to take some time to get ahead of schedule again because I was feeling like I was playing catch up constantly.
Well, I spent that month just binge watching stuff.
And then I spent the following month being angry at my step-dad and looking for a new house.
Then the last month has been spent moving, settling in and then getting ahead of schedule, finally.
I did a lot of soul-searching during my time away.
And by soul-searching I mean I learned more about astrology and now know that me being a Capricorn sun and a Libra moon explains a lot of things about myself.
Turns out my tagline Organized Chaos is a lot more accurate than even I expected.
But astrology aside, I had a lot of realisations and one of them was that I need to get the fuck away from my step-dad.
Luckily for me, my mum had the same self-realisation.
So what happened?
Well, after stripping away all of the drama in our lives, it became increasingly clear that my step-dad was the source of many a problem.
So, my parents separated.
Which sounds like it should be sad but it’s not.
Everyone that knows my parents has been devastated by the news. My boss who has known my parents for years was very shocked when he said “I heard the news, it’s very sad“ and my response was “For you may be.“
It’s been a long time coming. I’ve known for the last year it needed to happen, I was just waiting for them to catch up.
We’re definitely at the acceptance stage, however, the anger part still comes and goes.
My mum and step-dad were together for 15 years. That’s most of my life.
It’s hard to look back at those years with fresh eyes and see all the things that were wrong.
My mum and I spent almost an entire month looking for a new house and the one we are in now is small but filled with so much love.
The night before we moved I was hit very hard with one strong realisation.
The new house will be the first house I’ve ever lived in that will be abuse-free for me.
Every house I have lived in, there has been some form of abuse I’ve had to deal with, usually without realising that was what it was at the time.
When I realised that, I was hit with so much relief and sadness in equal amounts.
No one should have to live like that.
No wonder I’ve spent so much of my life battling mental illness, at war with my own mind.
So, some days I’m angry, really fucking angry.
But most days I’m so relieved and excited. Because I know that this is what I’ve been waiting for. This is the break I’ve been asking the universe to give me.
What’s To Come?
Well, if you haven’t noticed, I have been doing a lot of changes around here!
I’ve edited my theme, I’ve changed the way I style my posts. Everything is a lot more cohesive now.
I’ve started editing all my old posts so that they match the new look as well.
I tried getting it done before I came back, but it just wasn’t going to happen and I didn’t want to push back my return any more than I already have.
I’ve also finally worked out my posting schedule! Which you can find in my sidebar on the right.
I’ve figured out my Bookstagram theme as well!
I’ve got a new computer to work on which is very exciting and will make blogging a lot easier and efficient for me!
I’m also a Book Depository Affiliate now, for more information, see my sidebar.
I’m hoping to be much more organised and in a better head space here on out.
That’s it for me!
I’ll be posting a Down the TBR Hole post on Thursday so look out for that one!
I’m so glad to be back and I’m looking forward to the future of my blog!
What have you been up to?
What would you like to see on my blog?